14 days ago
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Advice please for challenging autism behaviours
Please bare with me as this is my first post! I would really love some advice from anyone that can help. Mr 10 year old ASD2 has become such hard work. Yes school holidays aren’t fun but it feels like it’s every spare non school moment. He is always complaining of being bored and while we have so many great options available all he wants is screen time. Mostly it’s playing the Switch or watching You Tube. We have always been strict around how much screen time he has. He currently gets around 1-2 hours a day. We will spread that time out so he has a bit in the morn and then some in the afternoon. We never do screens on school mornings. His meltdowns lately which are physically violent are all about either not getting extra screen time. Or Sometimes he melts down simply watching his brother play and not doing what he would do in certain games. I’m sure the screens don’t help with regulation! I don’t think removing all screens is realistic in todays tech world (but OMG how I would love to throw them into space every single day 😂). We are really struggling with just getting through each and every day at the moment. We are constantly walking on egg shells and using all the behaviour therapy strategies in the book! His outbursts scare the crap out of us all and his poor little brother gets beat up almost daily if we aren’t quick enough to intervene. He isn’t medicated as meltdowns never used to be this common. We sometimes go weeks without one. Any advice welcome 🙏
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Hi , my 10 year old doesn’t have ASD but you just described him perfectly and to be honest , many of my friends 10 year olds . Screen time is different for every kid but for my son it’s terrible . He is just as negatively effected as your son sounds . My son won’t do anything else when I say it’s time to turn it off and instead slams his door , picks on his younger brother ,l etc We see q psychologist and she said up to 70% of kids actually can’t handle the devices and it’s like a drug to then … they lose all sense of who they are and have a “ come down” effect . If I’m being honest , my 10 year old wouldn’t leave him room if he had the Choice and woukd he ok it 12 hours a day … not even kidding . I don’t have any advice …. But just wanted you to know that many children ( even neuro typical kids ) struggle with devices and the behaviour that devices create . Perhaps both of you seeing psychology woukd help work out what your sons limits are , how screens affect him etc - then you can make a plan based on what comes out of that . Just know - you are not alone . 10 year old boys have so much going on and devices are their air !! So it seems Xox
Yes so tricky. Def agree with the come down effect after tech time. Bloody sucks. But yes they need escape time like we fo with a movie, book or beach. I use timer countdowns 10mins, 5mins, 1min, ok off let's do this... We never do before school. .l 8k
Such a tricky journey. iPad time is my daughters way to regulate, it’s the only time she seems to be able to switch off and go into her little zone to calm. So she has it whenever she needs it as it definitely helps her busy mind and emotions. Perhaps it’s his aswell. He might be going through a growth spurt or struggling with the fact that change is coming and school is going back perhaps. Maybe not having a restriction might take the novelty away and after a while he may choose to do other things and be on the iPad during the the moments he needs down time…. But l know everyone is different, this is just what I’ve noticed in our situation. Behaviour can be super intense with my little one too, going through an ok stage at the moment but we are on the path to getting medication now.
My son loves Switch and YouTube too. Current obsessions are Splatoon, animation vs animator and riddles. He also loves Kids Learning Tube and AumSum It's been hard during school holidays because we don't regulate his time on there much and he hasn't gotten his other sensory needs met. Especially vestibular, proprioception and other tactile sensory inputs. So he ends up "high" at night and has trouble switching off to go to sleep because his brain is still going a million miles an hour to process all the information that's gone in during the day. We've been sick so haven't been able to go anywhere or visit playgrounds and the like. So it's gotten worse as the weeks have gone on. During summer holidays was different because going away in the caravan helped. There was a big jumping pillow at the caravan park and he would choose that over gaming. We also found that 4WDing sandunes and the beach are very much happy places for him. Even though he had devices with him he would turn them off when at these places or situations. In SA, we aren't back at school till next week, so I hope to provide a better balance for him with other inputs